I don’t know about you guys, but I have this thing that I do:
I set myself up for failure.
Mostly around expectations of how I think things should go.
And there’s no time worse for this tendency than during the Holidays… especially now that we have our babies.
I just have this perfect Holiday planned out in my head, and I get seriously frustrated and feel like a massive failure when that fantasy Holiday doesn’t pan out.
Especially these last few years… I felt like now that we have our three girls, we should be starting all of these holiday traditions.
But then reality hits. For example: how exactly are we supposed to go cut down our own tree when we have infant twins and a toddler? I’m sure we could have made it work somehow, but I know my limits.
Or how am I supposed to bake Christmas cookies when my toddlers have the attention span of 2 seconds? Don’t let these photos fool you, they were done about a minute after David snapped them.
The point is, I think the Holidays should go a certain way but then they always seem to go the way they’re going to. And we always enjoy ourselves… even if we don’t do all of the things.
But over the last year, I’ve been learning to let go of expectations for how things will go. With three little ones, I’ve learned that it’s just not possible to predict, and then execute the scenarios in my ideal world.
That’s hard for someone like me, who thrives when I can control every detail of my life (ha!).
But I’m learning. I’m learning how to just rest in moments and let them be what they will.
And you know? Almost always, the moments that come are the moments I really needed after all. Maybe not the moments that would make the prettiest Instagram worthy photos, but the moments that my soul rests in.
So for this December monthly mantra: may I let moments be what they will be.
How will you be celebrating this month? May it be as peaceful as you need it to be.
Until next time,
Karin
P.S. I just realized I skipped November’s mantra… whoops! But here’s October’s if you care to read it.
What I’m wearing:
Denim c/o (see more in my denim guide)
Apron is vintage
I really like this mantra. I have the same tendency to get an ideal situation in my head and be really disappointed/frustrated when it doesn’t go exactly as planned. This happens in little situations, like how I’m going to spend my evening, and in big situations, like how holiday plans are going to go. It’s helpful to have the reminder to go with the flow and enjoy each moment for what it is.
Yes!! I do this too with my every day things as well. Like: this is how my day is going to go, and when it doesn’t go that way I feel like such a failure! I’m really trying to work through that tendency and just enjoy each moment as it comes.
I think everyone sets expectations for the perfect holiday— and so many expectations are unrealistic! After all these years I think I have that kind of figured out. Nothing will go perfectly — but as long as there are gifts for all, enough food to eat and no adults crying– I’m good.
The perfect way to look at it Linda! I can only hope that I will grow in this area as I grow in age.
AMEN. With my 3 boys I have such unpredictable moments that it really makes me pause and a lot of times not even try a plan we think up. We were trying, too, to lighten up and just assume things will be different than we plan. And my version of the sweet baking cookies memory? Buy the tube or premade cookie dough from Aldi and listen to Christmas music while I slice and we sing and sneak bites. Works well for any holiday! Lol
We’ve done that type of baking many times as well Sarah! I’m definitely trying to still go ahead with my plans, but with the knowledge that it WILL not go according to plan. Having that expectation going into it has really helped me!
We are* not we’re, haha, we are still trying!